Cruce Signati


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The second full length album by Crucifix, including the all time favorites The Dreamer, Down 2 Die (Feat. Sean P), Fly Away, Cocaine, These Streets and Animal (Feat. Goodie Mob).


released July 21, 2010

Executive Produced by Crucifix
Cover Art & Graphic Design by Crucifix
Photography by Jani Salokangas and Crucifix
"Cruce Signati" is a product of Cruce Signati ©2010. All Rights Reserved.



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CRUCIFIX Atlanta, Georgia

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Track Name: Welcome 2 The Darkness
Welcome to the darkness where nobody don't know your name... These streets are so cold I can feel it in my veins. Welcome to the darkness where nobody don't feel your pain... Every non believer wanna tell me that I'm never gonna be nothing, but it's all the same. I keep thinkin' about the purpose of the pain... Is it for the fame? Is it for the game? Us selling our souls for pocket change? Choppin' up these rocks and things, knowin' in the end that we're not gon' change. So a young man going through things gotta prove things... them things become his chains with nothing left to blame, sittin' on a never ending life of shame. Shame! I don't like to think about it... What's the point of faith if my heart's gonna doubt it? You can see it in my face, I don't speak until I'm about it... there's things I can't erase in my past I ain't proud of... But it's hard to step up out of it when out of it means you done stepped out the furnace and all that's left behind is get murdered or clap burners. Trade living for nothing with dying for purpose and it'll take a lot more than prison walls and pistols to hurt us. Hurtin' deep inside I'm a slave to mind's eye, running while I'm blind by everything that shines. I burn it until I'm dead high... living like I can't die. Yet never catch the signs, things are destined to decline. Everything seems hopeless, so focused on another man to tell us where the hope is. So we follow these preachers and politicians with their 'hocus-pocus'. Never think about the signs of the End Times, so we stand blind while the day approaches... Waiting for the Eighth Beast Empire to start this, and mark us...

Welcome to the Darkness... at the back door. Open up the eyes to your mind and your soul. Welcome to the Darkness... forget about what you know. The world's about to change, so get ready for the show. Welcome to the Darkness... it's time, won't you get it through your mind while everything is fine. Things are destined to decline. All the signs of the times point to the End Times... things are destined to decline.

"Peace"... "Peace"... "Peace" in the Middle East... About as far-fetched as peace, peace on America's streets. Ain't gon' be no peace until the Beast proclaiming "Peace" meets the Prince of Peace during the 70th Week! Whether you're a degenerate pastor or spiritual bastard, or just a faithful, solid Christian anticipating the rapture. Until we lay our sin down at the foot of our Master, you can expect a steady rise in natural disasters!!!
Track Name: Animal (Feat. Goodie Mob)
HOOK (Khujo Goodie)
I'm just an Animal... My world is a zoo, I don't like me and I don't like you. No human emotion, no tellin' what I'll do. You better kill me before I kill you. I'm just an Animal... Yeah, a product of the streets, I don't eat, I don't sleep until I geek geek... blame it on society for creating a beast that don't give a damn about nobody. I'm just an Animal...

VERSE 1 (Crucifix)
Since I left the womb I was bathed in hate and my hate consumed my faith. And now my fate can't escape the pleasure of puttin' a bullet through the front of dirty south punk ass kid. I never believed in what I could see 'cause what I could see I never believed, never thinking the world would be giving me the living dream to be a beast. I know I got the will to teach if I go above and beyond these streets. Because I know I ain't scared to go when a man who wants nothing is invincible. I got the word of God planted on my lips, I'm ready to die and I ain't takin' no sh** . I never knew life would be like this, so until I'm gone I'm just, I'm just, I'm just an Animal...


VERSE 2 (T-Mo Goodie)
I'm sick and tired of seein' my people on dope but there is hope... My brothers and sisters, find yourself, find your purpose and let God work us. He can help you if you let Him, shawty on some real sh** , something you can feel sh** , keep it on the trill sh** ... I never tried the sh** . No powder sh** , I don't want it. Strictly business, bear my witness. Discombobilated paper... I done made it. My sh** got raided, didn't violate then that sh** there sank in. Busted out my window, it wasn't on film though but it was a blessing that I didn't catch them folk... the 45 would smoke.

BRIDGE (Crucifix)
I'm hurting feeling like nobody cares, my pride is broken... Oh my Lord. But all this hate has left it's scars on me and calloused every piece of my soul, until there's nothing left.

VERSE 3 (Khujo Goodie)
So they label me an "Animal" but who's the blood thirsty cannibals? Born three-fifths of a human, damn your flag, damn your constitution. Drug abuser, ten time loser... I don't discriminate, don't b;link I'll do ya! Snake n*** from the bottom of the barrel, sometimes I think about lookin' down the barrel and pulling the trigger, another dead n*** that couldn't cope with the arrows of society. I'm tired of you lying to me, stop saying you love me, where's the help you promised me? Years ago? Oh I forgot, I'm just an Animal... untamed, uncaged with fire in his cotton pickin' veins...
Track Name: Second Chances
Do you believe that God gives second chances,
when pain beats the rhythm and Lucifer dances?
I ain't ready for hell, but I'll take my chances,
praying God will forgive under the circumstances.
I'm sick of livin' life... sick of wastin' time...
What's the point of tryin'? What's the point of cryin'?
Aim the 45 dead between my eyes
and pull that burner trigger cuz a bullet never lies.

Sweat drips from the top of my face,
my mind focused, eyes locked in blank space.
My thoughts heavy like a thousand tons,
heart beatin' like the sound of a thousand drums.
I put my head back and look at the sky,
take a minute and wonder what it feels like to die.
If it's pain I face then pain I embrace,
knowin' this will be the last decision I ever make.
And I ain't lookin' for no pitty.
It's been me against the world since I left my mama's titty.
Why keep waitin' for the Reaper to come and get me?
I'll end it right now cuz life's so shitty!
Ain't gon' be no sunrise tomorrow...
One bullet in a six shot revolver...
Lookin' down a dark barrel to the gates of hell... I ask myself.


Hmmm, that's a real good question
with an answer about as far away as heaven.
Cuz really if God had a purpose,
then He could stop this damn bullet before my cranium splits.
I load the gun with a 45 shell with a hollow head
to make sure I blow my face through the back of my head.
I spin it once for my friends... once for my foes...
Take a breath, shut my eyes and slap the cylinder closed.
I put the tip of the barrel under the tip of my chin,
cock back the hammer and take a moment to repent for my sins.
Then put my finger on the trigger and pull it!
Once... twice... three times... still feelin' no bullet!
Forth time... click. Fifth time... click.
What the hell is goin' on? Ain't this some bullshit!
"God if you're tryin' to prove a point then this is it!"
The last shot. I pull the trigger, then... click.


I can't believe it, what's the chance of a misfire?
Did God come down from heaven to stop this bullet before I died?
Knowin' I would kill myself before I would kill my pride,
and it would take an act of God to make me appreciate my life.
I take a minute to marinate on the though at hand...
What's my life in the scope of things? I don't understand?
Constantly stuck between the man I was, and who I am.
God, You're the one that stopped this bullet... I hope you're listenin'!
Why would you want me here to live in all this hatefulness?


But how can I be faithful when things don't progress?


But what about when it's who I am that causes me to sin, and after your forgiveness I've failed you again?


Track Name: Down 2 Die (Feat. Sean P of Youngbloodz)
VERSE 1 (Crucifix)
I fade away from life... walkin' through the danger zone.
Down 2 die, my last prayer spoken,
I'm a product of the gutter... just a dead man walkin'.
I run these streets at night, I can sleep when I'm dead and gone.
Down 2 die, I'm sick of bein' broken,
ain't no promise for tomorrow tell me what the point of hopin'?
I ain't never had nothin' but a dirty burner, and a little bit of bud tonight.
Down 2 die, if the pain don't kill me
I'm gon' clap black choppers 'til the whole block hear me cuz.
I'm just another life sittin' on the edge of murder,
so I live it like I'm down 2 die.
Down 2 die, I'm sick of bein' empty,
I lay my soul to my city 'til Jesus come get me!

HOOK (Crucifix)
Fade away... Oh Lord, knowin' I could die tonight.
All I say... is "so long", then end it like I'm down 2 die.

VERSE 2 (Sean P)
F*** it, I'm outlaw shawty
ridin' on a Harley just me and my Glock 40.
Late night, dressed in all black, I'm a gangsta.
Suicide shiftin', apes, I sense anger.
But f*** it, I'm livin' like I'm dyin' tonight.
Con' liquor got me gone, man my mind ain't right.
All my patnaz, they some killaz, we a two-wheel gang.
Real untamed guerillas will bust that thang.
Thangz don't change, n*** we inherit the beef,
and I'm a soldier so I go and cook a steak for the chief.
In a ski mask in a dumpster, I ain't playin' no games
earnin' my stripes, crossin' out you b*** n*** z names.
The danger zone, I know that I'm playin' it wrong
but go to sleep in these streets and that ass is gone.
With all my might, the Lawd just restored my right,
so I'm ridin' on you n*** z like I'm dyin' tonight.


VERSE 3 (Crucifix)
Livin' on the edge, playin' in the dark... Ridin' like I'm down 2 die.
The devil's in my head, beggin' for heart... Knowin' I could go tonight.
Tell me what is life, if death is creepin'?
Waitin' around the corner to call my name?
In the air tonight, death is speakin'...
Sayin' "pack your soul, cuz it's time to go!"
That's just how it goes in the danger zone.
Track Name: Back of the Line (Feat. Khujo Goodie & Mr. Red Eyez)
HOOK (Crucifix)
I've been through some tough times but never asked for a dime. As sure as the sun shines I'm gonna try and get mine. Everyday I'm on the grind like I'm running out of time. If you wanna get me that's fine... just step yo ass to the back of the line.

VERSE 1 (Khujo Goodie)
I'm gonna get mine, front or the back of the line. Rain, snow, sleet or shine... skinny nicks, fat dimes. Living that life of crime, duckin' and dodgin' swine, everyday on the grind. The blind leading the blind... Baby mama's crying, politicians lyin', h*** hollerin' "PEACE!" But missiles still flyin'. Goin' through some tough times, Lord knows I'm tryin', starin' at that Mac-90 and that Glock 9. Better on some potent pine, writin' on some potent rhymes. Bloodsuckas wanna get me well then that's fine. Stand in line, take a number, wait your turn. It's gonna be a dawg fight... when will them bastards learn? I guess they never will until their blood spills. I wish I could pop a pill to make it disappear. But that ain't real bruh, wake up and smell the coffee, before your ass end up in a pine coffin.


VERSE (Mr. Red Eyez)
Born dyin', raised feimin'... seeing nightmares when I was daydreaming. It's hard to believe in God in a world that raises demons, this life is contagious and deadly like the AIDS semen. I'm just misunderstood, they just don't understand... A convicted felon in this life dyin' from his hunger pains... I ain't got no time for runnin' games, my girl keep prayin' I'm gonna change, I'm smokin' blunts back to back to kill these thoughts in my brain. I done lost it all... lost my mama, lost my dawgs... Seein' my whole world around me dyin' like a holocaust, but still tryin' to walk the walk in the worst predicaments. On the block remembering chapter 10, verse 13 in the first Corinthians.


BRIDGE (Crucifix)
I can't see the wind but it's moving... I might not see the things God is doing... But that don't mean that He ain't in control. I got 40 days and 40 nights of flooding before I touch that rainbow sittin' at the end of the line.

VERSE 3 (Crucifix)
Sometimes I wonder why heaven just seems so quiet. Why I can't get down on my knees and bleed this selfish pride. Why I can't set aside this stubborness inside, cuz every time I failed in life is every time I tried. I'm just so sick and tired feeding this empty feeling, everyday I'm praying, prayers are bouncing off the bedroom ceiling. God are you up there listenin'? Or just watchin' me suffer? Cuz it's just me against this world that wanna take me under! Starin' at that AK... that carbine... Bloodsuckas wanna get me well then that's fine! These desperate times transform the mind, it don't take but a starvin' kid to convert a man of faith to a man of crime. So I twist that pine, snort that line... a couple more time and everything will be fine. Everybody wanna be the one to pull the trigger thinkin' takin' my life is gonna take my shine. I'd rather be a blind man, than a man without a vision. For me homie, death is nothin' but a door to living!
Track Name: The Dreamer
I am the Dreamer and I say, "I'm dreamin' 'til I'm dead and gone!"
Cuz life is like a breath that fades upon an hourly stage.
I am a Dreamer, and I take my pain and put it in another song.
You can go on and let your dreams die...
But I ain't stoppin' 'til mine gets justified!

Wish I could count on one hand how many heartaches
in a lifetime I could find from these dirty snakes.
The world may never feel me, as I present the real me
but stoppin' is not an option until they pop me and they kill me.
You gon' hear me in your thoughts while I got a voice to sing...
The icon of a dream like Martin Luther King.
As long as I breathe the devil is gonna tempt me,
but I'd rather die tempted than to live this life empty. Seal it.
Cuz for the moment haterz are gon' try, but Dreamers don't die.
We leave a legacy to speak in our place,
long after we go down to the grave.
But I dream, though it seems...
Everyday it's just me against everything.
Trials are gon' rise until I rise with the King
but I know what it means to defeat their sting.
You can tell me that I'm never gonna be nothing
but I'm lovin' every minute cuz I know I'm destined to dream!


I've been through hell and back... and hell ain't what I'm plannin' for.
I over-stand the pain... but still don't understand it though.
I've been persecuted... until I found the antidote.
So go on and die for nothing... I'm gon' die for what I'm standing for.
Walking through this sea of suffering, but still I persevere.
I done cried enough... don't need no tattooed tears.
I've been dreaming for years, doubting the man in the mirror,
but if God is with me, homie tell me what I got to fear?
I count the cost on the day I was marked by the Cross
I could die tomorrow as a martyr and there's nothing lost.
So you can't kill me with your weapons, words or prejudice...
How you gonna take my life when God already scheduled it?
Cuz I dream, though it seems...
Everyday it's just me against everything.
And everyday it's just me against everything.


I wait for a new day, where everything's okay and I
can see my dreams before my eyes... before I die.
I'm gon' dream until I'm dead and gone!
I'm gon' dream until I'm dead and gone!
I'm gon' dream until I'm dead and gone!

Track Name: Paradise Lost (Feat. Cool Breeze of Dungeon Family)
HOOK (Crucifix)
I can barely breathe,
living in this Paradise Lost.
Everything I see around me
is just this chaos that I've caused.

VERSE 1 (Crucifix)
My past is a burden behind me I can never take back,
with consequences that way way outweigh their weight in crack.
Up when it's sunny, about that money
sittin' on the corner with a fyre snow bunny.
One hellafied rock, part raw, part dummy
for the first bad junkie that'll come and get it from me.
I sack blow, stack dough, trying to stack that status quo.
Even though that status don't change a damn thing for the pain I've sold.
I'm rippin' and running my mind until my heart is raw.
Thinking that once it's calloused I won't feel at all.
The pain's so steady… hurt's so heavy.
Sittin' on my chest like a two ton Chevy.
I'm ready to bust like a New Orleans levy, just wishing' a motherfucker would kill me already.
Don't give a fuck what your Pops said!
Steady bumpin at the gums will get you shot dead.
Go ahead and lose your temper like a hothead,
I'm gonna open up your mind like a pot-head… nuff said.
Don't give a fuck what you've been through,
cuz I done got a couple homies in the penn too.
I'll put that dot up on your head like a Hindu
and still kill it with a pistol and a pen too… I sin too.
But if the gift I was given and life that I'm living ain't pointing to Heaven 24/7 then what's the point of repenting?
Because the only path back to the Paradise Lost is a journey that begins at the foot of the cross.


VERSE 2 (Cool Breeze)
Now up early in the morning, up in Regency Park.
We bout to get this thing crunk before it gets dark.
I got fifteen sacks, and two fresh 0's…
Fifteen sacks and two 0's are gonna get sold.
About five of them dimes of that mid gon' get blowed.
By the time we shut it down my pockets gon' be on swole.
When them suckers see these hubbas we jumping' it's gonna explode.
When they see that kush we pushin' out front, it's ton' explode.
Anybody come around here that's askin' for me
I'm gon' give them suckers that Fila print off my feet.
And I better not see that sucker up at Central Station.
Man I better not see that sucker passin' the Marta Station.
Look here, I'm gonna tell ya right now, I can fight man.
Bwoi I hit you one time, you'll be like "Aight man!"
Now if I hit you two times it'll be "Goodnight man!"
Nigga I'll whoop on your ass like the white man.

Track Name: Cocaine
When I was a child I used to dream of what life would be like when I grew up... I never dreamed it would be like this...

Somewhere along the way I lost myself, can you see me? Somewhere between my dreams and hell I've given up everything I believed in. But I had a name once... and now I'm someone that no one knows. I had a life once... but this ain't the life I chose. Now I'm empty, drowning myself in my pain and nothing can fill me but this addiction for Cocaine.

Just one more time and I can leave this life behind. Now once again I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place, this hell I call home. It's got me lookin' like a madman, tryin' to understand this lust for substance that burns in my bones. Suicide on a daily basis, I'm too high to face this pointless, helpless, hopeless, heartless, God forsaken life I've wasted. Could you even fathom what it's like to be broken, steady lookin' for a reason for breathing except this evil you're smoking? And I never get a moment of peace, I'm living to feed the need for me to get geeked 'cause I can't eat and I can't sleep and I can't think what it is I do and what I don't believe...

I don't see how something so small could take control of me, I've given up everything I've loved, everything I've owned and now there's nothing left but this skin hanging from my bones. I don't know how something so small could rip the life out of my soul... I know that I must be blind but it's taking over my mind, all I want to do is hit it just one more time and I'll be find with this pain that I feel when I'm lonely... I'm lonely. It's got my mind gone, my mind blown, now I'm gone praying for Jesus to take me home... Because I had a God once, but this aint' the God I chose. Now I'm empty, drowning myself in my pain and nothing can fill me but this addiction for Cocaine.
Track Name: Pain Pill
In the bowels of life, the only thing we're promised is death... What do you use to kill the pain?

Rappin' was something that I did when I was younger, it wasn't about the money, it was all about the hunger. Now I'm writing while this rap game slumbers, knowing if I didn't then my pain would take me under.

Lookin' back on everything that I've lost, I wonder if the lesson was worth the cost. But from here until we make it to the Boss... what's your Pain Pill?

Jesus Christ, how could I understand a lesson taught to a boy that was meant for a man? All my life I had to stand between purpose and doubt, but what's the point of God's plan if I can't figure it out? A young boy with a machete, hiding in the halls, hearing screams through the windows, bullets bouncing off the walls... As a child in the slaughter it ain't about balls, it's about accepting death the moment that death calls. I remember when my daddy looked me in my eyes, and said "Son I want you to know that tonight you're gonna die, but you fight for your family and life is all that you lose... and you kill as many of these rebel soldiers before you do..." Too young to grasp the meaning of death, but old enough to grasp that killing was all we had left. So you accept the bloodshed in circumstances, and turn a blind eye to conscience while Lucifer dances. This lesson I learned came with a price... growing up believing that death was just a way of life. And to this day I feel the thunder but I never see the rain... I made it out my family's slaughter to end up dying in my pain.


Ain't nothing sweeter than a finger of that Afgoo, to roll up my pain and blow it to my rearview. Cuz dwelling on it multiplies the anger so until I'm gone I'll be known for rolling Gorilla Fangaz! Kill it all! When I got that call from Khujo Goodie, told me that my n*** P-Nut was shot, dropped and bloodied. 3 birds to the chest but just one bird shy, to survive the fire... it took him 3 days to die. Now I hate myself, for 3 days I cried. I gave him dap the night before but never said goodbye... Then 3 days later once I've dried my eyes, I hear my cousin was tortured for 3 days and burnt alive. I was petrified! With one thing to decide... whether or not when I kill these b*** es I cut out their eyes. So as I'm walkin' out the door in a rage of revenge, I realize I'm gambling the lives of my 3 kids. So listen for wisdom, here's the lesson. Everything comes in 3s, even the blessings. So if it took Jesus 3 days to rise from the dead, then here's my Pain Pill... 3 Gorilla Fangaz to the head!!!


I find I'm lost inside this pain from all this death I've seen. And I don't know what it takes to make this suffering leave, until I hear the Boss saying drop your pain on me. But here I go again, seeking out a substance to take away my pain... I notice... I notice that it don't do a thang. I don't mean to be hurtin', I don't need to be burdened. If death is all that's certain then I can live by Faith. Jehovah, Father... I lay my pain at your feet.

Track Name: These Streets
I know what I've seen, I know what I can't forget.
I don't know nothing but these streets.
I'm so tired of selling drugs, hustlin' and bustin' guns,
but I don't know nothing but these streets.

I started out never lookin' back on my past, living like the world around me was about to crash. I never had sh** but a dream and a blunt in my pocket... No hope but the roach that burns out when I drop it. I don't give a damn about a pig, I'm breakin' the law. Go get the pistol at your crib, I got two in my draws. I been packin' a piece since I stood four foot tall, never trusted a busta with a bigger mouth than his balls. Sixteen as a runnaway, gang war gun play. Seventeen lettin' shots blow on the highway. Eighteen feelin' as hard as God. Nineteen lookin' at a punk judge on a gun charge. I ain't beggin' b*** , put me in jail... Look at where the hell I'm at now, I'm living in hell. What's life? I end up dead or incarcerated, with free room and board, saying "look mom I made it... and I hate it."


I bought four or five Zs with my cash, and now I got four or five tweakers on my ass. Every single one wants a gram or two, but that's how that powder do when them fools finally choose to live like them junkies do. They wuz born to lose, but I wuz born to profit. What you lookin' for cuz I bet you that I got it. I got that powder, let them eat it, then convince them that they need it, they believe it and you're seein' profits rising like a penis. I ain't got no truck on 24's, ain't got no spinnin' rims or no Lamborgini doors... I've always been poor, but I will let you know. I got a 44 and I bet I'll let it blow. Dead cold. Nobody heard it when your ass was gettin' murdered. So I leave that stinky body in a building that's deserted. How perverted and absurd of me to kill you undeservedly. But in time there's sure to be a reason to occur to me...


I lost everything I had so fast, and seen young lives shattered like broken glass. Life ain't fair, so it seems, but I know what it means to be a child and let a bad decision kill your dreams. One minute on the corner sellin' them sacks, the next minute you've lost years you can never get back. Everybody makes mistakes homez, but f*** it... Ain't everybody blessed to get the chance to learn from it. I'm a man now, I understand now that life's hard, but it's all in God's hands now. I find comfort in knowin' I'm blind, but still seein' that His hand's a lot bigger than mine. They can take my life from me, put two in my chest. But if I died for a reason then they're only killing my flesh. If I can rise above this wrong I was taught to repeat, they can't judge me for only ever knowin' These Streets.

Track Name: Fading
I'm just sittin' in my window, throwin' down pennies to the hell below.
Puffin' Afgoo with my kinfolk, wishin' for one day more.
But once my senses burn... this one thing comes to light.

Life is fading, with each new day. Slippin' through my fingertips.
And I keep waiting to wake up one day, and life not be like this...
Stuck in the gutter.

What's pain? What's hurt?
What's life, if it's defined by dirt?
What's rich, if I still die a slave?
I came naked from the womb, I'll go naked to the grave.
Until I make it to the grave, I'm fasho I'll...
be feelin' empty like a junkie on a coke high.
But how are you really supposed to feel once your folk die?
My only answer... get blowed 'til you're so high!
I can't believe we can't see that,
the whole world's losin' it's mind tonight.
And sooner or later you gotta be that,
or homie lose your mind tonight.
But once our senses turn, this one thing comes to light.


I'll burn until my time is gone.
Thinkin' about the times I've known.
Everything that I've seen
is enough to keep a madman feeling at home.
I ain't never let go of the Bible...
But I ain't never let it's words try and change my life.
When living day to day is about survival,
ain't a lot of thought put about living right.
If we're living for nothing... we might as well die forever.
With bullets flyin', and homeboys dyin'
how can I not think about the afterlife?
We fade like leaves, while all the sin that we seek
is the wind, just blowin' us away!

Track Name: Fly Away
I love herb, I don't want to fight it so I take that weed and I light it. Ain't nothing in this world to make me want to stay. I want to get high and Fly Away...

Lookin' back on my life I've come so far from the man that I was... a broken, homeless, hopeless, empty shell, looking for love. I came up out of the gutter with a dream of having some kids, knowing that the life I'd give couldn't be no better than the life that I've lived. But I've got one chance to break this cycle, make right all my wrongs... I swear to Jesus Christ it hurts me just to write out this song. Though everybody's got their demons from the choices we make, we can either burn, learn, run, hide or correct our mistakes. Not caring about life just seemed so simple, shootin' at little kids, until I think about my daughters takin' a bullet for something I did. Then everything that made so much sense is long and forgotten. I hate myself and I can't even remember the reason I shot them, so God tell me... what's love if hate can break it? What's life if death can take it? I don't really believe in life or love... so roll the bud.


I wonder what it takes to be free, crying, confined in my misery. Ain't no pictures of perfected been painted within my history. I'm used to being the subject of peoples aggression, left alone turning to violence and drugs for affection. It's like I'm walking this line between my love and my lust. The streets been calling me for years sayin' "why'd you forget us?" I wanna go back so bad, invitation to my casket. It seems I'm torn between the man I am and a man of the past... you selfish bastard. Actin' like my kids ain't enough. They hug me sayin' "Daddy play with us before we grow up!" So I throw away this gangsta mask before I watch my daughters grow into women on the other side of a prison glass. All that I ask in this life I've been giving is to give back the life I never had to my wife and my children. I pack a blunt then say a prayer, find shelter from stress... and like Psalm 55 I'm gonna Fly Away and be at rest.


Love is in the air tonight, but I wouldn't know. When I'm lonely, feeling like the world don't know me... there's nothing here for me. Love is just a lie tonight and that's all I know because I'm lonely, feeling like the world won't hold me... there's nobody here for me.

Track Name: Mud
Everything I feel is mud... nothing hurts quite like this does... I feel it in my bones. My whole world's spinning from above, and everything I am is mud. Dirty... filthy... I'm shapeless... empty...

Blood, sweat and tears fuel the hurt, mixed with a lifetime of doing dirt. And all the dirt brings pain until the tears flood, then I wonder why I'm standing knee deep in the mud. Trying to believe in something with no evidence, can't tell the right over the wrong so I ride the fence, because in the end only a terrified fool repents. I'm so dirty that getting clean don't make no sense. And since I can't stop my world from spinning I traded my soul for guns, money, weed and women. The only pleasure that I get is when I'm sinning... This heart won't break but it keeps on bending. Been in, been down this road before, in the back of my mind knowing everything gets old, because when I'm gone everything I loved fades quick , but every time I reach for the Truth I slip...

Everything I feel is mud... nothing hurts quite like this does... my whole world's spinning from above, and everything I am is mud.

I can't take this confusion no more, time to let it go. Pull myself together and try stepping out on my own... A child born like a paper doll, because every step out on my own ends up a nasty fall. I head straight down until I hit rock bottom, then hear a voice in the chaos saying "I got him!" Then two hands slowly pick me up, I notice holes in the wrists as they lift me up out this mess I've made... the hell I've been... Then all the sudden everything's spinning again. I'm screaming, "God, where you at? I thought that you loved me? I can't make it alone, don't take your hand from me!" Then everything goes still... the spinning don't stop but His hand is all I feel. Then as I pray God use me to do your will I realize I'm standing on a pottery wheel...

Everything I am is mud in my Father's hands above... Mold me... make me... take me... break me...

Track Name: Slave 4 Life
I was born in the city, it wasn't pretty dawg.
My life fallin' through the crack that I'm smokin' on.
Rationalizing everything that I knew was wrong.
Sippin' sin 'til it baptized me, wrapping myself in these chains...
And I'll be gone in a minute.

Sin called... I heard.
Compromised my heart for a pile of dirt.
One wrong, turned right...
a second later I can't even tell wrong from right.
Top speed, downhill.
A little anger turns quick into the thought to kill.
A couple blunts, a couple pills,
a couple lines, just to cover up how I feel.
I'm wrong and I know it, but I can't even care no more.
I'm just tryin' not to show it... wonderin' what I'm livin' for?
Stuck in between my faith and my demons, and I'm
kickin' and screamin' just lookin' for meaning in life.
Too proud to believe in a God I ain't seein'
still I want it even though I'm...

A slave tonight, free in regard to right.
Thinkin' I'm lovin' every minute.
A slave for life, and I can't even see the light.
But I'll be gone any minute.

Forget the God-thing...
If anything's raining down on me from heaven, it's a lot of pain.
But in the end, I'll be wonderin' what it was I gained
from fillin' my life with the things of which I'm now ashamed.
What if in the end I find I'm wrong,
and I ain't got nothin' left?
When everything I loved is dead and gone,
and the paycheck to my sin is death?
God you see what I've been through
and all this life that I've ruined.
Where all these things that I don't want to do,
is what I find myself doin'.
But I'm free! And I love it!
I've seen God and I want some more of it!
I'm still a slave... just a different master.
But I've never worn chains that felt so free!!!

Track Name: Forgotten
I'm feelin' like... uselessness.
I'm feelin' like, there's nothing I can do
to make me feel alive, when I'm this far from You.
I can't take this life and make it make any sense.
I can't make it right... so still I ride this fence.
Torn between the God I love and the memories of my sin.
But every time I fail is a reminder that I need you again.

Jesus, hold me in Your arms like a child.
Cuz You it's been a minute since Your baby smiled.
Lift me out of this hole that I've dug.
I put Your mercy on... then trade it for this world I love.
Forget about today and how I failed.
Tomorrow will be another day to prove myself.
I'm sick of feelin' so rotten...
But today will be yesterday, and yesterday will be forgotten.

This life that I hate... still walkin' in the shadows of my mistakes.
My sin, in my face... still livin' in this past I can't erase.
I'm a broken life, put back together by You.
Yet it's this broken life that I keep on runnin' to.
I know it's gotta be just sympathy that got You holdin' onto me.
I've been wrong for so long... I don't know what You see in me.


I'm hangin' on the edge...
Somewhere in the middle of this war in my head.
I'm tryin' to walk a line...
pretending everything is fine,
when I'm dead inside. It's just a piece of me I let nobody know.
I'm so tired of chasin' You to let You go...
I can't take it no more, cuz each time that I leave,
is like steppin' in a world with no air to breathe.
I'm on my knees is shame, cryin' out Your beautiful name!